May 16 2023
“The truth may be out there, but the lies are inside your head.”— Terry Pratchett (via nightlyquotes)
Adult. Queer
“The truth may be out there, but the lies are inside your head.”— Terry Pratchett (via nightlyquotes)
such an honor for CAMP DAMASCUS to be selected as one of Goodreads FANTASY SCIENCE FICTION AND HORROR BOOKS OF THE SUMMER i appreciate it so much. fact that this is decided by reviews and recommendations of actual goodreads members is so moving thank you
The wonderful Glass Octopus. Living at depths of around 3000 ft and only being about a foot long, these strange little creatures are rarely seen by scientists.
I don’t suppose anyone would know if they ever made French audiobooks of the Discworld books by Terry Pratchett? My dad grew up speaking it and now has to use French for his job so he wants to re-immerse himself in the language and Terry Pratchett is his favorite author. I can find links for ebooks and print versions but not audiobooks and idk if that’s bc I am googling wrong bc I myself do not speak French.
Anyone?
This is the only one I can find:
https://www.kobo.com/ca/fr/audiobook/de-bons-presages-1
It’s the only one on Audible or Kobo, which makes me think probably it’s the only one that’s been professionally produced. I found a couple other leads, but they all traced back to organizations for the visually impaired. Those have special rights to produce their own audio versions of just about whatever they want, but they have to limit the distribution to people who qualify as visually impaired.
Yeah I suspected Good Omens was probably the only one actually made for broader use but at least it’s something!
If it helps at all, my favourite way to re-immerse after a long time is stand-up comedy - it tends to be a lot more how regular people talk, it’s findable online, and it’s fun. Eddie Izzard did at least one full show in French, although I don’t know what her accent is like.
I believe your pain. I believe that it exists, and that it is as bad as you say. I’m sorry that not everyone has. You deserve so much more.
oh my god you’re so right
Fibromyalgia is characterized by chronic, widespread, and debilitating pain, thought to be triggered by a process known as central sensitization. This is where the body’s central nervous system mistakenly amplifies nerve signals passing through the brain and spinal cord, sensitizing the person to more pain in a vicious feedback loop.
But our understanding of the disease, which affects mostly women, is rapidly shifting with long overdue research, and studies have pointed toward changes in the peripheral or outer nervous system also.
A 2021 study introduced antibodies from people with fibromyalgia into mice, thereby increasing the test animals’ sensitivity to pain. The investigation’s findings made a strong case for the syndrome operating as an autoimmune disorder – or at least one where immune cells play a key role.
“Growing evidence demonstrates an intricate bidirectional interaction between immune cells and sensory neurons,” writes the research team, led by molecular and cell biologist Sara Caxaria from the Queen Mary University of London.
an interesting study overall as someone with fibromyalgia! the paper itself is quite a bit beyond my biology level, but I can admit to a few major concerns in labeling this useful on a human level so far:
- obviously, mice studies cannot prove the direct correlation in humans, even though they are often an ideal subject for more… I suppose, proof of concept? It’s certainly interesting, but in general mice studies cannot be extrapolated to humans, especially when unknown factors (in this case, fibromyalgia itself) are in play.
- I noted from the linked paper that the mice studied were explicitly all male. I’m curious how that could have changed things, since in my personal research (again, not a bio/medical person, though I am in STEM) I’ve seen a consistent note that fibromyalgia is - currently for reasons not understood - quite a bit more common in women. on a personal note, often when studies do include men, I’ve noticed that those studies seem to regularly be the odd result out on otherwise consistent trends.
- this study is also quite explicit in saying “hey, we’re just looking at pain, don’t extrapolate this to fibromyalgia as a whole yet”.
so! interesting read, curious to see what future research will say, but I’m not holding out hope that it’s groundbreaking yet.
[“What I didn’t understand until much later in life was that boys changed their behaviour around me, because they could not sexualise me and that was confusing to them. To be fair, I had the same problem with them. I could not sexualise them even though I knew, as a girl, I was supposed to. But if you are a man, don’t be dispirited. If you manage to make me laugh, and many of you have, at least you know you did it on merit alone.
Once I figured out that the reason I found girls to be much funnier than boys was because I much preferred their company, I realised that I had lots and lots of feelings about girls. And, although it didn’t necessarily lead to erratic behaviour, it was very disorientating. So perhaps what I was feeling was the same thing girls felt around boys. The thought process was as simple as that, and no sooner had I stacked these ideas on top of each other than they clicked very satisfactorily into what I understood as truth. I was gay. It really did dawn on me as matter-of-factly as that. I don’t remember where I was or what I was doing, but I remember the sequence of thoughts very clearly.
And as soon as I had the thoughts, I tried to un-have them. I really did not want to be a paedophile. They sounded like terrible people. Fortunately, my river of ignorance still ran quite deep, so I was able to completely repress my sexuality without too much effort. All I had to do was stop actively participating in life. Thankfully, despite my lack of ladylike qualities, it didn’t take me long to work out that in order to be a “lady” in the world of teenage girl golfing, all I had to do was not be a “slut.” So, given that I was shy, deeply closeted, fat, had selective mutism and undiagnosed autism, I was never going to be caught straying very far from “appropriate” behaviour.”]
hannah gadsby, ten steps to nanette
I’ve been a disabled homemaker for 5 years now so I wanted to share the resources that have helped me take our home from complete chaos to reasonably functional and enjoyable.
If you’re not functioning…
If you’re constantly tripping over things and getting injured, eating food that makes you sick, dealing with pests in the home, and struggling to complete basic tasks like feeding, clothing, and bathing yourself, then you should start with…
KC Davis aka StruggleCare aka DomesticBlisters
I recommend KC Davis’s stuff with a big heaping dose of “keep what works and leave what doesn’t.” She’s one of the few people I’ve seen talking about compassionate care focused on maintaining a level of personal functioning rather than maintaining a home. Her stuff has been very helpful to me during some very challenging times.
I think her some of her best work is probably her videos on the 5 step tidying process, the ones on setting up bedside hygiene and food kits, and the ones on dealing with DOOM (Didn’t Organize Only Moved) boxes.
That being said she has a tendency to use neurotype as a shield for not reckoning with other dynamics in a situation (gendered, narcissism, etc) when asked for advice by viewers which can lead to this “all people with neurodivergence are good” vibe which I find off putting (especially as an autistic person). I mention it because her bleh stuff was all I was coming across and I missed out on her good stuff for a while. It’s worth picking through though.
Her book is a little better on the whole.
If you’re functioning but still very overwhelmed…
If you can complete your daily activities of living pretty regularly but you’re still losing papers you need, rebuying items you didn’t realize you had, or looking around your home at a mess that feels impossible to clean, then check out…
Dana K White aka A Slob Comes Clean
I love Dana K. White’s stuff. Honestly, I recommend her to every level on this list but I think she probably shines brightest in this category.
Her 5 step decluttering process is pure fucking gold. It’s a decluttering process that doesn’t rely on feelings at all - really helpful for those with trauma or alexthymia generally. She has multiple videos explaining it and even more where you can watch her go step by step with someone over the course of an hour and make a huge dent in some very overwhelming mess. Its the process I’ve used to go through over 50 moving boxes to declutter so we could fit in this much smaller space we moved to in April.
Her day to day cleaning advice is also excellent. Her concept of dishes math has really helped me make decisions about what chores to focus on when I’m low energy. Her 14 Days to Opening Your Front Door series is amazing if you’re having to host for a given occasion but your home is a wreck.
If you’re not painfully overwhelmed by your stuff but there’s still a lot of friction in your home…
If your stuff doesn’t overwhelm you but your home still doesn’t feel that good to be in, you’re still not finding things when you need to or it’s taking you a long time to find them, you create homes for things but they look terrible or they never seem to stick, then you’d love…
Cassandra Aarssen aka Clutterbug
Clutterbug types were kind of a game changer for me. It’s what really opened my eyes to why the systems that worked for me did not work for my partner. She is a Bee - lots of small categories that are all very visible - and I am a ladybug - big bucket categories that aren’t visible. When I reorganized our space according to the compromise between our types, Butterfly - big categories and very visible - all of a sudden the systems just worked so much better. There were many fewer fights sparked by things not getting put away or not being able to find things. So I really recommend her videos on the different types and examples of each.
Quick word of warning, she does have regular videos about diet and exercise that I personally find pretty triggering to my disordered eating habits so I’m not subscribed to her and just check her channels every now and then so it’s easier to skip over videos where that might be a topic she talks about.
Cliff Tan aka Dear Modern
Cliff Tan’s work is the most recent of these resources that I’ve come across but holy shit I cannot recommend it enough.
Because my parents didn’t originally intend on my partner using the room she wound up using, there’s simply not space to keep some of the furniture and items in there anywhere else. Meaning she just kind of has to keep a fair bit of junk in there. But after watching (read: binging) the Dear Modern YouTube channel and seeing him completely change spaces by moving furniture around, I redid my partners room over the course of about 2 hours and it’s a completely different room. Way more comfortable and she’s already mentioned she’s getting much better sleep.
So I really really recommend his stuff. Sometimes what you really need isn’t new stuff but just rearranging what you already have.
If you’re pretty content with your home but want to streamline the process of caring for it…
If your home is pretty functional but regular tidying, deep cleaning, and maintenance tasks specifically keep falling through the cracks, then you might like…
FlyLady System
There are lots of systems out there for house keeping but I’ve yet to try or see one that seems to do better than FlyLady for me. Since with my illness my energy varies wildly, I don’t necessarily do things when her system recommends but I do them according to the priority her system ascribes to them as I’m able.
FlyLady is a notoriously convoluted website so I really recommend learning from a secondhand source. The Secret Slob and Diane in Denmark are my favorites.
Maintenance Lists
There a lots of maintenance lists out there and honestly finding one and doing what you can is better than nothing. I personally like the ones from This Old House because they’re broken up into annual, seasonal, monthly, and some weekly tasks - which are essentially priority categories, similar to FlyLady. I’ve linked the winter one here but there are many others to pick through depending on what you want to work on.
Bonus: Paper Clutter
My System
This is what I’ve arrived at after years of experimentation. It’s an amalgam of a few different ideas from different systems in one place. I keep mind on my fridge but put yours where ever you’re dumping paper anyways. If you’re in a room or live in a car/backpack - I have ideas on how to organize it for those in this post too.
Sunday Basket
Need something a little more robust? The Sunday Basket is probably be best version of a paper (and other stuff) system I’ve seen. Got something that needs dealt with? Chuck it in the Sunday Basket. The creator also has videos on long term paper storage ideas if that’s something you need as well. But her videos usually run an hour long so I recommend starting with either the Minimal Mom’s video or She’s in Her Apron’s video.
Bonus: Digital Clutter
PARA System/Building a Second Brain by Tiago Forte
The branding on this system can be very productivity tech wonk which is off putting to me but when I finally started hearing what was at the core of it and applying it - my digital life was changed. I’ve linked my absolute favorite video he’s done here. Ignore the bit about it being the last in the series, most of us are already using some note app and if you like it you can always go back and watch the rest. But just applying what’s in that video to your digital systems will make things easier to find.
Hope this helps someone out there!
asexual-not-asexual-detective:
Am I the only one who thinks that hitting a kid and abuse are different things? Like, if I ever had a kid, I wouldn’t spank their ass raw or something like that. But a bop on the mouth or the ear pull or a smack upside the head? Yea. Those are behavior modifiers.
Except they’re not.
The studies done by the trained psychologists in this joke show that little kids don’t associate being hit with the thing they’ve done wrong. Very small children only understand consequences that are directly caused by the thing they did. Steal a biscuit, biscuit tastes good. Then for no reason mummy hit me. Very different to stole a biscuit, now no biscuit after dinner because I stole a biscuit.
And they also show that when a child is old enough to understand why they are being hit that non-physical punishment is equally as effective and less mentally harmful in the long run.
Do you know who benefits the most from hitting as a punishment? The parent. It gives a satisfaction rush. Parents do it because it makes them feel good.
Basically kids have two stages: too young to understand why they are being hit so physical punishment is useless for anything other than teaching a child that bigger stronger people can hit you whenever they like (Which sounds like the same lesson you would learn from abuse)
And the second stage is old enough to be reasoned with so many punishment options are available and you chose physical violence because it makes *you* feel better, which is an abusive action.
The only time a person should ever use violence against another human being, of any age, is to stop that person from being violent themselves.
Hitting a stranger is a crime. Hitting someone small who relies on you for food, love, and shelter should be as well. Don’t hit your fucking kid.
Hey Sam! Since it's currently AO3 donation time, I'm wondering what your thoughts are on it? I'm asking because you've written RPF and it's one of many "anti-AO3/anti-AO3 donations" people's favourite things to bring up when they're complaining about AO3 getting so many donations that it continuously obtains an excess of its donation goal whenever donation time rolls around? (Wow, how many times can I say "donation" in an ask?)
Sorry if this question bothers you! I don't mean to offend or annoy.
Hey anon! Sorry it took a while to get to this, I don’t even know if the drive is still going on, but the question came in while I was traveling and I didn’t really have the time for stuff that wasn’t travel-related. In any case, let’s dig in! (I am not offended, no worries.)
So really there are two issues here and as much as some people who are critical of AO3 want to conflate them, they are different. While some criticism of AO3 may be valid, rhetoric against AO3 tends to misinterpret both in separate ways.
First there’s the issue of what AO3 hosts – RPF, yes, but more broadly, varied content that some people find distasteful or think should be illegal, which is a misunderstanding of the purpose of the archive and more broadly a dangerous attitude towards the concept of freedom of expression.
Second, there’s the issue of AO3 generally outpacing its fundraising goals while not allowing monetization, which is a misunderstanding of the legal status of AO3 and to an extent a misunderstanding of philanthropy as a whole.
The longer I watch debates about content go on, the more I come to the conclusion that I was fortunate to have a teacher who really wanted to instill in us an understanding of free speech not as a policy but as an ongoing dialogue. It’s not only that freedom of expression “protects you from the government, not the Justin” as the meme goes, but also that freedom of expression is not a static thing. It’s an ongoing process of identifying what we find harmful in society and what we want to do about it.
Should the freedom to shout “Fire!” in a crowded theater be restricted? Should the freedom to yell slurs at drag performers? Should the freedom to teach prepubescent kids about gender, sexuality, and/or safe sex? Should the freedom to wear a leather puppy hood at Pride? Who gets to say, and why?
I was nine when my teacher did a unit on freedom of speech and the intersection of “harm prevention” and “censorship”, which is (and should be) a discussion, not a set of ironclad rules. This ambiguity has thus been with me for over thirty years, and I’m comfortable with the ambiguity, with the process; I’m not sure a lot of people critical of AO3’s content truly are. Perhaps some can’t be, especially those affected by hate speech, but RPF is not hate speech. It’s just fiction. Or is fiction “just fiction”? This is a question society as a whole is grappling with, although fandom seems to be a little out ahead of society in terms of how explicitly we discuss it.
copperbadge
You called this a sidebar, but I REALLY think it needs sharing more widely on its own:
Despite what you’ve read, the reason “we” can’t monetize our fanfics on AO3 has nothing to do with the site being the product of volunteer handiwork or AO3 having it in their terms of service or it being considered gauche by some to do so; it’s because
IT’S ILLEGAL.
I cannot say this loudly enough: It is against federal law for a nonprofit to be used by its staff, volunteers, or beneficiaries to earn direct profit from the services provided by the nonprofit. You can be paid to work at one, but you cannot side-hustle by selling your handmade friendship bracelets for personal gain on the nonprofit’s website. If the nonprofit knowingly allows monetization of its services, it can lose nonprofit status, be fined, be hit with back taxes, and a lot of other unpleasant bullshit can go down, including prosecution of those involved for fraud. If you put a ko-fi link on your fanfic, you are breaking the law, and if AO3 allows it, they are too.
So i do have trouble running anything in my lap, but it is old and very basic but I can't really get a new one, how do i learn how to change its RAM, battery and anything that could make it perform better?
So I actually have a post that’s a basic explainer on this kind of stuff, but here’s my specific steps for figuring out if your computer can take more RAM, what kind of RAM it takes, and if/how you can install it.
If you’re in a hurry or this entire thing looks intimidating, scroll down to the section with the pink text for a quick and dirty way to find what you’re looking for that I don’t wholly endorse because there are sometimes errors with this process.
This is literally my job, so while this guide won’t cover all contingencies it is the basic process that I do every time I need to source upgrades for a computer.
How to Find RAM for your computer:
Step One: Identify the model of your computer. This is usually visible in a sticker with a barcode on the back of the tower or on the bottom of a laptop. If you aren’t sure, you can search “how to find model number of [Samsung laptop][HP desktop][etc.]” I’m going to use a Lenovo M710e as my example here, because it was the computer I had to find RAM for yesterday.
So, the ThinkCentre M710e is the product line and the model/product number is 10UR001JUS. The product number gives us the information about the specific configuration of that computer when it was sold, while the product line gives us the general information about configurations that were produced as part of this line. So for example, all M710e desktops will accept the same RAM technology, but the 10UR001JUS specifically came with 2x4GB RAM modules while another line might have come with 1x8GB RAM installed.
GENERALLY SPEAKING it is better for you to work from your product ID/product number/model number and not from the product line.
Step Two: Find out what memory technology your computer uses, what’s installed, and what the max your computer will accept is. Most manufacturers will have spec sheets, so if you search the part/product number you will likely see a link from the manufacturer for the specifications of that device. Here’s the one for this computer:
So this tells me that the computer has 8GB total memory in 2 modules of DDR4 RAM with a speed of 2400 Mhz. When I am shopping for RAM the important numbers here are DDR4 and 2400. BUT this does not tell me how much RAM the computer can take or what the physical format of that RAM is, so I need to look a little more, which I do by searching “[model number] specifications,” which brings me to a Newegg page that has more information about the specs:
This shows me that the computer has 8GB of DDR4 2400 RAM installed in 2 slots. It shows that the computer only has two slots, and it shows me that the maximum RAM for the computer is 32GB. What this means is that if I want to upgrade the RAM I would need to remove a module from at least one of the slots.
RAM tends to come in 4GB, 8GB, 16GB, and 32GB modules. If I wanted to increase the RAM in this computer for the least amount of money possible, I would add one 8GB module, and that would help the computer a lot, taking it from 8GB to 12GB. BUT if I wanted a higher performance for just a little bit more money, I’d replace both 4GB modules with 8GB modules. RAM is happier and works better when the modules in the computer match, so what I’d do is look for 2 8GB modules that are faster than 2400mhz.
Step Three: because I’m me and I was the one who initially ordered this computer five years ago and I have RAM upgrades for this model in my order history, this is where I would stop. But if it was for a computer that I wasn’t familiar with, this is where I would check my work. I do this by going to the Crucial Memory tool:
I’d click on “upgrade my computer” and I’d use the “upgrade finder” option.
If you are searching for a RAM upgrade on the computer that you are currently using, you can use the Crucial Scanner tool which will read the specifications of your system and take you to recommended upgrades that Crucial thinks are compatible with your system. I do not 100% endorse doing this, and if you do use this option I recommend checking Crucial’s work because I’ve ordered RAM on Crucial’s recommendation in the past and then found that it was incompatible when we went to install.
But, like I said, I use the upgrade finder option. There are a TON of computers listed in this, so once you go through manufacturer (lenovo, in this example) and product line (for crucial, “product line” here means “thinkcentre”) I’ll use ctrl+F with “M710e” to find the actual product, because scrolling though this bullshit is for chumps:
That takes you to a page with what should be your computer’s specs and recommendations for product upgrades:
As I scroll through, looking for 16GB upgrades, I notice that all the RAM listed is 288 pin, which is the correct size for this computer. RAM tends to come in two physical formats for consumers, Desktop RAM and Laptop RAM. Desktop RAM is longer, Laptop RAM is shorter. There are some more complicated layers to that, but what it means is that I need to match the RAM in my search to the format the computer uses.
So let’s say that I want to upgrade my computer here and I decide that I want to go with the 3200 speed. So instead of buying from Crucial (which you could do if you wanted to) I decide to shop around. If I search for “16GB DDR4-3200” on Amazon here’s what I get:
One of those is 288 pin and will fit in desktops, the other is 260 pin and will fit in laptops or very small form factor desktops. You need to make sure, either by checking the specifications from the manufacturer or on a ram compatibility site or PC part picker, that you are getting the correct physical format in addition to the correct size/technology/speed.
Step Four: Shop around. I prefer not to buy from Amazon when I can help it, and I like seeing what deals I can get. You *do* have the option of clicking “where to buy” on Crucial and there are usually several choices of where to get that specific Crucial part number, but I want to see if there are more generic options, or options from other brands I like.
A newegg search shows me an A-tech 16GB kit with the specs I’m looking for, but at a higher price than Crucial. Poking around a few places doesn’t show me any better deals than Crucial, so I go back over to the crucial site, click on “where to buy” for the product I want, and choose to get it from B&H because it’s not amazon and I’ve got an account there.
Step Five: Figure out how to put the RAM inside of your computer. The easiest way to do this is usually to check IFixIt.com, a website designed to show people how to fix their computers.
IFixIt has guides for some types of ThinkCentres but not an M710e. I can check out the M72e, because that’s a pretty similar model, but then it turns out the page is a stub. So I search “how to upgrade RAM in Lenovo M710e” and I found the user manual, which has an diagram of the internal parts of the computer, an exploded view of where everything goes, and a section on replacing RAM modules.
Replacing RAM on most desktops is pretty simple, and if you haven’t done it and this set of diagrams doesn’t give you much information, I really recommend watching some videos from Paul’s Hardware that show you how to handle computer components and identify what parts of a computer you’re looking at.
Replacing RAM on laptops is usually a bit more complicated than on desktops. But sometimes it’s even easier (one of my computers just had a little door on the bottom where you could add RAM if you needed to). Regardless, the principles are the same - there is a slot on the motherboard for you to put RAM in. Watch videos or look at tutorials for how to open up various kinds of computers and see if you’re comfortable replicating those steps.
SOME CAVEATS:
Sometimes you can’t add or replace RAM. Sometimes RAM is soldered directly on the motherboard. That should be noted somewhere in the manufacturer specifications.
Sometimes computers are more of a pain in the ass to upgrade than they’re worth. Most ultra-slim laptops are difficult to get into and most all-in-ones are a *nightmare* to get into. Watch videos of people working on computers similar to yours before you buy anything to figure out if you’re even going to be able to get into the damned thing.
On older laptops replacing the battery is very easy, on newer ones it’s getting more difficult. Use the same process of identifying your computer model number to look up compatible batteries, then look up how to replace batteries. Sometimes they’re just inaccessible and difficult to get at, and sometimes you literally don’t even need tools besides your thumbs.
Anyway. That was kind of a lot. I hope it made sense. Check out the linked post at the beginning for tips on performance improvements outside of hardware upgrades, and good luck.
ms-demeanor
it’s weird if fat people don’t exist in your art
i want to say that this isn’t an attempt to guilt you into learning. i don’t want you to disingenuously draw fat bodies because i made you feel bullied, or because you want some sort of online clout. i’m tired of begging other artists to do something they obviously don’t want to do, so i’m not begging. i’m stating what i think of you and your work. no matter your skill, no matter your presence: it’s weird if fat people don’t exist in your art
I wanted to share something with you because there’s a sentiment I see quite often in my friends (and also in myself sometimes).
“I should write. I haven’t written in quite some time now and I am a writer. So I should write.”
What isn’t said out loud, but still part of the subtext is usually something along the lines of “Am I allowed to call myself a writer if I don’t write every day/week/month or write a certain amount of words/chapters/works”.
“Am I enough (of a writer) if I don’t write whenever I physically can?”
So maybe this metaphor has been done before, I don’t know, but as I was wandering around in our garden, I had a thought:
An apple tree, right? Or whatever kind of fruit-bearing tree/bush you like best.
It is spring for me, my friends! Whether or not the words are blooming for you at the moment, please remember your worth as a person or as a writer is not defined by your “productivity”. If you need a reminder, it’s right here! My apple tree is stunning and I don’t know what summer will bring, but for know I encourage you to enjoy your thoughts, your words, or your environment 💕